Friday, April 29, 2005

All Who Wander Are Not Lost

this is an audio post - click to play

Cool ... audioblogger was still set to post to AAPATT, but I just copied and pasted the code and voila ... post is now where I wanted it to be.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

T-Minus One And Counting

My time here is coming to a close.

I'll be in the office this afternoon and tomorrow morning and then ... summer vacation! Took matters into my own hands this morning at the staff meeting and informed my colleagues that I would be taking unused vacation time starting next week. I didn't discuss it in advance with my boss - I just told everyone (with absolutely no tears and no cracks in my voice) that since my position was ending on June 30, and since they have already advertised for my replacement, I would be taking my unused vacation time starting May 2.

I could tell that some of them were a little shocked that my departure was so imminent, and a couple of them have come in and had private conversations with me that have convinced me that I did the right thing in making the announcement myself. They respect me for the grace and dignity that I've shown, and I feel good about it too.

There is also universal agreement that I will go on to bigger and better things - when I'm ready. My plan was to take the summer off and not even look for a job until September, but just last night I scanned the classified ads and saw a position that sounds perfect for me. I'm debating about whether or not to apply ... the more I think about it, the more I think I should at least send in my resume. We'll see.

Monday, April 25, 2005

By The Light Of The Moon

Just a tease from my other blog ...

It was only after we finished that I noticed the moon. Lying on my stomach, propped up by a pillow, I gazed out the window across the park and saw it - a full moon. The sky was clear and if there were any stars out, I couldn't see them. He was spent and starting to drift off, but I nudged him awake and pulled the curtain aside so he could see the shining orb.

"I ordered it just for you," he said, and we both smiled at the absurdity of the statement.

Thursday, April 21, 2005

That Was Easy

I guess I shouldn't be surprised. This week's challenge on "The Apprentice" was to design an office product that Staples could market. And thus the Desk Apprentice was born. As soon as I saw it, I went over to and sure enough, you can get your very own for $34.99.

That was easy.

A Sisyphian Task?

In an email exchange with my housemate, Phil, this morning, I commented that I was trying to wrap things up here in the office - "So close and yet so far from being done ..."

He responded and reminded me that he had gone through a very similar experience four years ago when he was denied tenure. He compared it to the myth of Sisyphus, who "was asked to do a futile and frustrating task, but he 'keeps his chin up' and accepts it as it was part of his responsibility. After I knew I had been denied tenure, I kept thinking of that myth - and the futility of doing my job, but also of the pride I took in doing it well. There was no way I was going to let the people who sabotaged me get the satisfaction of seeing me miserable and unhappy (even though there were plenty of times I felt that way), and compromising myself and my standards."

So, I have thoroughly prepped for tomorrow's donor visit, and now I am working on a report for the upcoming board meeting (to which I have not been invited) and when I'm done with that, I'll finish outlining suggested moves and strategies for my prospects. And whether or not 'the powers that be' recognize the exceptional final effort I have put forth, I will know that I did my job to the best of my ability, and I will hold my head high as I walk out the door.

T-minus two and a half and counting ...

A Good Stiff Drink

That's what you get when you let your tea steep for longer than usual.

Had a headache hangover most of the day yesterday, but went to the gym anyway to try to sweat it out. Then signed up for some sessions in the tanning booth. I know better than to trust the 70 and low 80 degree temperatures we had earlier this week. In fact, by the time I went to bed last night, the temp had dropped 30 degrees, from 75 to 45 degrees. Welcome to spring in upstate New York.

It rained overnight and all of a sudden things are popping! Leaves are beginning to burst and the grass is greening up. Next up - pollen. Already some trees are dropping their buds and it won't be long and the yellow season will be upon us.

So, here I am in the office. We are at T-minus three and counting - I'm doing a donor visit tomorrow, and then I will be in the office Monday and Tuesday of next week and then ... that's all she wrote, folks. I was a little pissed at my boss on Tuesday because he insisted that I take a co-worker with me on this donor visit tomorrow, but I got over it. I'm just going to do the best job I can do, get the hell out of here and move on with my life.

Sounds like a plan.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Way To Go, John!

I'm still awed and amazed by anyone who can run a marathon, and on Monday, John ran the Boston Marathon in 3:57:48. Way to go!

I drove to Boston on Sunday to meet John and his wife, Barbara, and to wish John well. They were very gracious and invited me to join them for the pre-race dinner down at Boston City Hall, which was just a short walk from their hotel. Barbara took this photo just before I departed - now that I've outed myself and am showing The Face, I can share it with everyone.

Wishing John Well

Again, congratulations John. And thanks for reminding me that it's important to have goals in life.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Strange Days

I'm fighting a migraine. I have no idea where it came from. I ate dinner and drank some caffeine and took my Imitrex, but it doesn't seem to be working. Sucks to be me right now.

But on to the title of my post ... it's that time of year when it can get really warm during the day, yet still be cold overnight. It was still hovering around 75 degrees outside when I got home at 6:30, and the house felt cool by comparison. The end result is that you just want to stay outside until it gets dark or the temperature drops, whichever comes first.

I tried to connect my outdoor hose, but it seems as though the connector is stripped, so whenever I turned on the faucet, the nozzle kept shifting on the hose and leaking all over the place. Guess that will be a weekend project.

I have a bad habit of not unpacking after a trip, so I still have a half-filled suitcase on the floor, and I also have several under-the-bed bins sitting out, waiting for the semi-annual shifting of the closets (i.e. taking out the shorts and putting away the turtlenecks). The end result is that the bedroom is trashed, and it's not helping my mood.

God this is a wicked headache.

Is It Just My Imagination ...

... or is Constantine Maroulis wearing eyeliner and mascara?

How Did She Know?

I've been feeling a little down and overwhelmed this afternoon (part of it because the soda machine is sold out of Diet Pepsi and I exhausted my personal stash) and somehow my mother knew because she just sent me an e-card and the message read:

"I believe in you and know that something wonderful is waiting for you."

Excuse me while I grab a tissue ...

Anything But Ordinary

That's my new favorite song. Somehow it got into one of my iPod playlists, and the more I hear it, the more it resonates with me.

"Anything But Ordinary"

Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak myself out
I laugh myself to sleep
It's my lullaby
Sometimes I drive so fast
Just to feel the danger
I wanna scream
It makes me feel alive

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breath?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

To walk within the lines
Would make my life so boring
I want to know that I
Have been to the extreme
So knock me off my feet
Come on now give it to me
Anything to make me feel alive

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breath?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

Let down your defences
Use no common sense
If you look you will see
that this world is a beautiful
accident turbulent succulent
opulent permanent, no way
I wanna taste it
Don't wanna waste it away

Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak myself out
I laugh my self to sleep
It's my lullaby

Is it enough?
Is it enough?
Is it enough to breath?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

Is it enough?
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

Friday, April 08, 2005

Oh My!

This just in ... when searching for "drunk women with male strippers pic of male strippers getting a blow job" at, this blog comes up as the 10th result.

Imagine that.

No, really - imagine that because there are no such pics here.

3 - 15

I give up.

Trying to wrap things up here in the office - I'm off to Charleston SC for a little vacation with my mother on Monday and will be audioposting next week (brace yourself, Barrie).

Looks like it's going to be a beautiful weekend here so I'll probably overdose on yardwork - because Lord knows I can't count on the housemate doing it for me when I'm gone! Besides, I like to do it.

Have a good one, everyone.

Thursday, April 07, 2005

The Thing About Turning 40

Had a call today from a customer service rep with whom I do business, and I figured it was as good a time as any to tell her that my tenure here at this fine institution was going to be coming to an end. She expressed sincere regret and asked me about my plans for the future. I told her it was a watershed year for me, what with turning 40 and all, and that I was going to take the summer off and think about life for a while.

She congratulated me and told me she had a good friend who once expressed frustration with folks that whine and complain about turning 40. She said that 40 was a great time to be a woman because by then you know what you don't want, you know what you do want, and best of all - you know how to get it!

Amen, sister.

Now, if I could just figure out the part about what I do and don't want ...

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Carter's Got Class

I'm sure some hot-blooded radical out there will disagree with me, but I'm going to say it anyway.

Jimmy Carter's got class.

Turns out we've only got five tickets to the Pope's funeral, and Jimmy Carter is not going to get one. I'm not sure how the story is being circulated, but the bottom line is this - five people will be representing the good old U. S. of A. at the funeral: President and Mrs. Bush, former presidents Bush and Clinton, and Condoleeza Rice.

No matter how he got snubbed, he got snubbed. While you might convince me that as the Secretary of State, Condie deserves to go, I think she could have stepped aside for a former president - the first and only president to entertain the Pope at the White House. Jimmy could have asked that we ask for more tickets (I know it's a crass term, but I'm not sure how else to phrase it) to the funeral, but he won't.

Cause he's got class.

Wonder if Bill Frist and the rest of Congress who are chartering a plane and crashing the party without tickets or even hotel rooms, for that matter, will invite Jimmy to stow away with them?

If they do, I hope he says no.

Morning Greetings

The Big Boss: Good morning, Kenna. How are you?

Me: Sore.

The Big Boss: ...

When you ask someone how they are, do you really expect an answer? Do you really care?

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Cinco de Mayo

I've been getting an inordinate number of hits based on people searching Google images for Cinco de Mayo. Last year I wished y'all a Happy Cinco de Mayo and used an image from Google, thus the hits. I think.

But seeing that today is April 5, that means that Cinco de Mayo is just one month away. And this year Cinco de Mayo takes on an even greater significance. I have decided that Thursday, May 5 - Cinco de Mayo - shall be the start of my 40th birthday celebration.

I've never been a big birthday person, but I've been thinking and talking about turning 40 for most of the past year. I don't want to be one of those people that moans and complains about turning 40. I want to celebrate it.

You heard about my party on February 11. The owner of the restaurant where that party was held has already told me that he is planning a Cinco de Mayo celebration. My birthday is actually May 9, and as of May 2 I am supposed to be officially on vacation. So, why not start the birthday celebration on May 5?

If any of you want to join me for my weekend long birthday bash, let me know!

3 - 14

Tried posting this yesterday but Blogger kept kicking my ass and I have a feeling it may continue to do so today.

Friday, April 01, 2005

Shuffle Me This

Eureka! I think I've got it!

For weeks now, I've been trying to get me a gravatar. Now that I've outed myself by showing The Face (and The Body) I figured I might as well step all the way through the door and associate The Face with all of my blogging interactions - posts and comments.

I created my gravatar and got a rating and then ... nothing. I followed the directions on how to enable gravatars when using Blogger, and since I use Haloscan as my comment host, I went there to see if there was a switch that needed to be flipped. I found my way easily enough to the Beta settings tab and tried to plunk down my gravatar URL.

Ran into a little glitch - the URL was too long. No problem. Being the resourceful gal that I am, I went into the Haloscan forums and queried the good folks there. Someone pointed me to so I skipped over there and got a (you guessed it) tinyurl for my gravatar.

Back to Haloscan and drop in my new tinyurl. Nothing happens. I give up for a week or so. But then I see that in addition to Maria, now Amanda and Scooterdeb and John have gravatars. I simply cannot be left out!

I try again. Create a new gravatar. Snag a tinyurl. Put the link in the Haloscan settings. Suddenly I have a gravatar! But wait ... it's a default gravatar. Now every comment without a gravatar has The Face staring back from it. Not what I wanted. I trash the tinyurl and fret and fume some more. I do NOT want to have to ask for help.

But earlier today I caved and asked Maria for help. She said that she didn't do anything via Haloscan and asked me if I had uploaded my photo to Yup, been there, done that. But I'll go back and look again.

So I go to and I surf through the site again. I see that they are having a contest to win an iPod Shuffle, and all you have to do to enter is to write a post about something related to the blogosphere, and include at least one mention of gravatars. Apparently that was just the motivation I needed, because all of a sudden it dawned on me ...

... when I created my gravatar, I had to set up an account using my email address. My gravatar was linked to my email address! I went back and checked my blogger account. You guessed it - the email address did not match!

When I created my blog on January 31, 2004 I didn't have a GMail account. Because GMail was launched on April 1, 2004. Exactly one year ago today. My Blogger account still used my old email address. By making sure that my Blogger account was updated with my current GMail address, I believe I have solved the problem of the missing gravatar.

After all this, it would be a cruel April Fools Day joke not to reward me with that free iPod shuffle. Especially since I've had such bad luck scoring winning Pepsi caps.

Letting Go

Why is it so hard to let go of things?

I'm back in the office after being out for most of the last two days, and I was just rummaging through one of my drawers looking for a return address label so I could order some plants (because God forbid I actually be doing real work here in the office). In the drawer is a small blue Tiffany's box that I can't seem to throw away.

A few years ago I organized several sessions at a conference, and as a thank you I was given a Tiffany's pen - complete with the blue box, tied with ribbon. I never undid the ribbon. Instead, I carefully slid the ribbon off the box and replaced it after I had extracted the pen from the soft bag nestled atop the cotton inside the box. And for at least two years, the box has been in my drawer because I can't seem to throw away that little blue box.

What is it? Is it the status symbol of the box that I don't want to lose? That immediately identifiable color that says "Oohhh ... Tiffany's!" It was at least a year before I even took the pen out. It was so nice I didn't want to use it, or lose it. Why do we do that? Why do we save things? Erma Bombeck wrote a column once after she learned she had cancer and talked about all the things she would have done differently, and one of the things she said was "I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage." What good do things do you wrapped up in a closet somewhere? Use your china and crystal and celebrate today.

I just threw the box in the garbage.